day 5- Cities, castles & towns
URBAN ADVENTRE
" If an army marches on its stomach, than a Castle sits on it’s ass.
It’s filthy, revolting, and you need to bathe every day for a week before a lass will even come
near ya again. But there is no surer way to bring down a fortification than through it’s shitter.
Literally.
In large, posh, foppish estates, those dandies who lead from the back want a cushy place to
drop their waste cause they don’t want anyone to think it stinks, and then doesn’t give a
second thought to where it goes, or what might come up that same route.
The number of times me and a crew of dead-men have crawled up a latrine and taken
enough hostages to bring the entire keep to it’s knees, not to mention the smell, ha! Good
pay all around.
For larger compounds, like a city, then there’s entire sewers. Usually you can get the local
riff-raff in on it, as they’re eager to get the battle or siege over with, so they can get back to
cracking heads & picking pockets. They already live in the filth, they don’t care who’s got run
up top, usually. And if not, again, just barreling through with enough well trained dog-eaters
and they give you wide enough berth you can run the entire under-city, like you please.
Even smaller encampments, like a wood fort or a small town with a high ranking figure,
they’re so used to doing their business outside the border, give em a week to let it pile up. If
they’re clever, they’ll fling it out at you. Either way, the more clever way is to throw it right
back, with some of your own.
Hard to keep everything clean when you don’t know whether to shit or go blind.
The realities of warfare are often cold, gross and stink, and that’s tactical knowledge you
can count on.
- Gulliver Velmot, Sapper & Saboteur. Special Tasks, 37th Imperial Regiment
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