Thursday, January 11, 2018

D and December 2017: Week 3 - Day 1(Belated)

D and December 2017: Week 3 - Day 1(Belated)

Week 3 - Realms and Planes

Day 1- Feywild/shadowfell
pixies, shadowrealm

"When I was but a lad, not yet half as tall as I am now. I fell in love with a Brownie.
Playing in the woods outside the town, I came across this tiny little girl in a drab rag of a dress, 
too many freckles, and a smile much too wide for her head.
I asked her name, and she asked the same back, so I said 'me first' and she again replied the same.
So I pointed at myself and said 'Jaxon'. She pointed to herself and said the same.
So I pointed to her and said 'you?'
She giggled, a laugh too deep for her frame, and she said 'you', and clapped.
I clapped as well, though who knows what for, as I didn't know if that was her name or if she even
spoke common. But I waved bye as I ran back home.
We met again at the same tree several times over the course of a week, and I would talk & talk at her,
she would only reply by repeating a word back now and then. The best friend a child with too many
words in their head, to have really.
Except for one day, she had the big grin once again, and started talking to me. 
She supplied my young mind with countless brilliant ideas, as well as plans for how to enact them.
We set off for town.
This was going to be great.
Needless to say, after a full day of terrible pranks & near death injuries as a result, I was belted 
into tears and nearly sent to the closest chapel for a proper cleric to exorcise me. 
The Brownie disappeared as soon as I was caught, no honor among thieves, and did not return
until the next day, my eyes still filled with tears and my backside still stinging.
She left again, as a crying boy rubbing his rump is not so much fun, and I never saw her again.
Only years later, did I learn what she was, and was lucky for the small lesson I was taught. "

Monday, December 25, 2017

D and December 2017: Week 2 - Day 7

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7- Oddities: temple guard gumi bears with ooze/cube stats who hug to death

“Huggi Gummi Shrine Guardians”:

Large sized

Humanoid magical constructs

Ooze/cube traits

Attack is always Grapple, “hug” for crushing damage. If “hugged” for 3 rounds, is absorbed into gummi, treat as effects of cube.

“The cutest, tastiest constructs you’ll ever meet! Comes in a variety of colors/flavours! Order now!” - Wilhelm Wonkia, Wizard of Whimsy, Confectionary Conjuror.

Sunday, December 24, 2017

D and December 2017: Week 2 - Day 6

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6- Spooky/undead: aesthemus the undead sorc whom we dragged through the city by his eye sockets

“Great. We’ve escaped the dungeon, but how are we supposed to get out the gate past all those guards with that illusion cancelling spell. This is a castle full of humans, you’re a dwarf, she’s a gnome, and he’s a corpse!?” The bard cried.

“Guys, guys! I got this!” the undead sorcerer crowed.

And that was the day three guards, one average, the other with a hat pulled low over her ears, and a third, very tall but stout at the bottom & skinny up top in a long tabard, dragged a skeleton out the gate by its eye sockets to “take out the trash”.

Saturday, December 23, 2017

D and December 2017: Week 2 - Day 5

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5- Humanoid: “DMNPC”/second PC, Gripli named “Brain”

Brahn’s head hurt. The soft, not-green people he travelled with were talking a lot more than usual. The bird one did not agree with the pale one, and the small shiney one looked sad. Brain, the smallest one, who lived in his hat, but was green and very smart, so that made him a good brain, was also talking.

They all stopped talking. Brahn thought they might finally be done. He did not know what was so much to talk for. There was a bad man far away, who would bring war. That was good. Brahn could fight the bad man, and the better fighter would win. There was something about people who could not fight being hurt. A lot of them.


“Yea, Brahn?”

“If you kill those who can’t fight, that has no honor. Does the bad man kill those who can’t fight?”

“Yes, Brahn.”

“We should go find the bad man before he comes here. Kill him & forget him, because he has no honor.”

“Yes, Brahn. I agree.” Brain looked up from beneath Brahn’s hat at the others. “ I think we can all agree on that.”

The soft, not-green people nodded.

The bird one said “ Good thinking Brahn. “

The pale one chuckled that cold sound she would make that before driving in a knife and patted Brahn’s arm.

The small shiney one stopped wringing her claws and tightened the strap on her music maker. A sign she was ready for battle.

“We walk into a tree again” Brahn asked the bird one.

“Yes, Brahn.”

“Okay. Brain, I close my eyes. Knock when we get there.” Brahn shut his eyes tight, and tried not to think until he felt Brain tap in his hat . . .


“You got it.” The Gripli replied to the Orc, but the Orc, Brahn, had already shut his eyes. “Silvertip” he said to the tengu bard, gesturing they should get going.

“Crafty devil”, the elf rogue smirked at Brain as she rested her other hand on Silvertip, who was casting the often-used plant-walk spell.

“Honestly, Mes, I wonder which one of us is the smarter one sometimes” he replied to the elf. “You comin Diz?” He said to the Kobold bard, who quickly clambered onto Brahn’s shoulders.

Silvertip then lead them through the tree and out of a hedge in a royal garden on an entirely different continent.

Friday, December 22, 2017

D and December 2017: Week 2 - Day 4

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4- Celestial/Demonic: there’s been teiflings who are descendant of BBEG demons in the game . . . but . .  Chris hoity toity paladin came to mind

“Of angels & demons, I’ve known plenty. Far be it from me to judge a wing by it’s covering.

Come to think of it though . . .

Long ago, we traveled with a noble beacon of good, justice & righteousness.

He was an Anointed Knight and bathed himself & his gear in divine oils at the beginning of the day.

So long as he had a full night sleep, his breakfast gruel, and a good rub down, he was a pillar of compassion and right.

But heavens forbid his precious rest be interrupted, he was no longer a hoity-toity paladin.

He was then naught but a great, grumpy, glowing man.

Those smites do smart.” - Ran Dansin, traveling troubadour.

Thursday, December 21, 2017

D and December 2017: Week 2 - Day 3

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3- Abyssal/fey: brownies/that tree smiled at me, Unicorns?

“Unicorns are assholes” supplied Dermit, as he flopped onto barren hillock, dropping his greatsword next to him, scowling at the forest the group had just departed.

“ Something like that, yeah”, Rovita replied. “ You’d think something that old & wise would learn to listen to common sense. Eh, Grundev?”

The dwarf looked up at the half-orc female at the use of his name. Squinting as the sun was barely blocked by the crossed axe & lute on her back. He looked away, pulling his holy symbol from beneath is beard.”Age & wisdom don’ mean empathy. You’d think some racism would’ve worn off in’at time.” He considered the figure on the symbol. ”Ye saw the way she kep’ lookin’ round before she asked if we had an elf with us.”

Dermit spat.

“Agreed”, Grundev absentmindedly muttered.

“So, we give up and let him deal with the Wilting when it finally reaches the forest” Rovita said, staring into the wood, almost as if she could ask the Unicorn over the distance.

Grundev nodded at his divine talisman, as if it had also been offering suggestions the entire time. “Nah, united front, two brains are better ‘an one, blah, blah. Le’s go track down that elf that we saw back in town. Maybe ‘e would’ nah mind a stroll through the wood.”

“Never fought a Unicorn, could make a fortune off that horn alone”, Dermit offered, still, waiting for an answer that he would need to get up & collect his blade.

“Ha. Ha. Ha.” Rovita said, flatly, no mirth in her expression as she turned towards town and began walking.

Grundev followed quietly, his shadow crossing over Dermit, still prone.

“Fine! Fine.

Probably all lies about the healing properties & spell uses anyway.

Never actually MET a robe-wearer that had those mats, or anyone else who’d ever even tried to collect them anyway.

Right? Right!?”

Dermit had to jog to catch up.

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

D and December 2017: Week 2 - Day 2

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2- Draconic: fantasy latin - the language of magic.

Draconic the language, one of the oldest, a mainstay of magic.

A harsh tongue, yet musical, full of weight & meaning.

Effectively “Fantasy Latin” for several editions, only spoken by draconic beasts or casters who studied the arcane arts.

Sometimes used as a “secret language” among young wizards in passing when traveling through rustic areas. Rough graffiti on the wall of a tavern might actually be written in that dialect, as a message to others interested in eldritch secrets.

Tattooing certain characters or phrases onto one’s flesh and imbuing it with mystic energies might lend potency to the ward, as blood is a very significant reagent.

Ultimately, being able to talk to a Dragon in it’s own prose, with all the property courtesies & manners may mean the difference between being friend or dinner.