Bribe-rrito

mmmm, 10 hour old Chipotle for breakfast is the best. Thanks D. Weibe for the Bribe-rrito.

Bribe-rrito: Noun - (see also: GM Bribe) A delicious mixture of tortilla and other burrito stuffs, delivered to a game master in order to keep one's character; alive, rolling in xp/hp/gp &/or "phat lewtz"
Ex: "My character took some nasty ability damage, but I brought a bribe-rrito to game and now I have an even BETTER ability mod."

A Lull With Lols & Rage

I'm sorry, as per usual, for the interruption in service.
In H4773r related excuses(news) we had ANOTHER successful S.G.I.S.Con: This year with less stress!

In less exciting turns of events my store is going out of business which means  I will be job hunting in between rushing around trying to sell every last fixture and piece of product up until the last day of the month to help recoup losses for the owners. As well as getting my official paperwork into each of the School Districts to begin subbing. Oh yea (short rant) and while we were gone at S.G.I.S.Con mysterious persons were in our room and we have yet to interrogate our roommates as to the actual events, meaning I will want to focus even more in finding replacement employment after my store closes and then moving out shortly thereafter. Because I am tired of this bullshit.

As per Joesky's Law, here are some cool  things I enjoy:
For those of you who may have missed it I am still listening to Nerd Poker and if you haven't yet, here's the link to Ep 9? Anyway, don't listen tot he episode if you haven't heard them all yet, but listen to the "crazy shit" clip lower on the page about Sark's fave story about an old TSR spy game. It's awesome.
http://www.earwolf.com/episode/the-survivors/

And then, get yo SWAG on! Steampunk Writers & Artists Guild!
http://steampunkwriters.ning.com/
Gonna get maself up in there before the end of the spring so I can start getting feedback on some pieces I need to get fleshed out.

And I'm starting up a couple D&D games again Friday & Sunday. Friday should get jumping here this next week. I'm DMing, get this, a high level Pathfinder game SET IN Eberron! Yay setting conversions!
And Sunday should also be Pathfinder set in Golarion BUT we had some discussion of doing a Vampire: Dark Ages (yes OLD ASS White Wolf) game. we voted off that because we only had one physical book, BUT, Moose may let me borrow his AND I might just use a pdf of the book I have and run a print off of it and use that as a "ghetto" book. It could work, yeah?

There ya go guys, sorry to not touch base but I will try to find some time to make a buffer of posts with my usual fare of nerdness as I am prepped to be busy as hell the next few months with birthdays and cons and adjusting to a new schedule with subbing and whatever job I acquire next.
Later H47ites!

Roll your toon! All of it!

Earlier this year a good friend of mine was in town for a visit, so we had to RP cause he only visits so often from out of state and his time is often monopolized by his slew of friends & family.
Because we didn't have the entire crew from a different gaming group, and none of us really wanted to start lvl 1 chars out of nowhere, we decided to make randomized characters.
I jotted out a roll chart for classes, struck out some that I really didn't want to deal with, as was communally agreed upon by the other players (but they're still on the list if you want to use them).
We then realized to speed things up we should randomize race & alignment. And then there's more, but here are the tables as we developed them . . ..

Roll a d20 for class
1 Magus
2 alchemist
3 oracle
4 inquisitor
5 cavalier
6 summoner
7 sorcerer
8 rogue
9 ranger
10 paladin
11 monk
12 fighter
13 druid
14 cleric
15 bard
16 barbarian
17 gunslinger
18 samurai
19 ninja
20 witch
20 wizard
20 roll twice
(Strike through denotes we did not use them for that game, roll twice was for dual classing as I think we were running lvl 8's? and I don't know how we forgot the Wizard, or if we chose not to use it)

Race!  We had 3 charts associated w/ race, lets see if I can make them make sense . . .

Roll a D10
1 gnome (nobody wanted to play a gnome) orc
2 halfling
3 human
4 elf
5 1/2 elf
6 1/2 orc
7 dwarf
8,9 or 10 roll on "Next Chart"

Next Chart d10 alternative races
1 aklo
2 tengu
3 earth (elemental race, don't remember the name, not going to look it up)
4 wind ( " " )
5 fire ( " " )
6 water ( " " )
7 (Not "Heart") goblin
8 kobold - Roll on "Color Chart" below
9 Assemir
10 teifling
(there was a general agreement to not have damphires)

 I've developed some tentative alternative racial rules for Kobold sin the games I play/run that there are  different colored Kobolds, just like the dragons they emulate giving slightly different racial perks &  flaws.
Color Chart: D10
1 red
2 blue
3 green
4 black
5 white
6 brass
7 silver
8 copper
9 bronze
10 gold
I'm even looking to expand it to the alternative dragon "colors" later on.

Then you roll on your alignment chart which has been modified to only those allowed in this particular campaign.

Alignmet Chart: D10
1 or 6 Lawful Good
2 or 7 Chaotic Good
3 or 8 Neutral Good
4 or 9 Chaotic Neutral
5 or 10 Lawful Neutral


Oh yeah, these tables are intended for use with Pathfinder, but I'm sure the equivs can be translated to other system.
Now, I know these charts exist already in several incarnations, many of them inside the very source books we use, but, like many things in this ultimately customizable universe we all play in, sometimes you want something a little more tailored to your needs, so here's one for my groups and groups like mine.

Enjoy h47ites, see you later Space Cowboys!

Knapplesauce RPG Eve

A good pal of mine "Jubbles" is in town for a while so I'm hosting an RPG one shot. Since it's somewhat short notice and I don't even have an entire group confirmed I'm keeping it simple and posting the info here so that everyone involved can access it considering some don't use facebook and some don't use twitter.

Level one Pathfinder Society Characters!
(What the hell does that mean?) THIS!! HERE READ then DOWNLOAD THEN READ THIS
if you're like "Fuck you, H4773r! RPG's are about pretend not reading!" Then please build a level one pathfinder character, starting gold 150, point buy . . .
all stats start at 10, point values are
7, –4
8, –2
9, –1
10, 0
11, 1
12, 2
13, 3
14, 5
15, 7
16, 10
17, 13
18, 17
No scores below 7 or above 18, all before racial mods.
There are a few adjustments to item creation feats, siege engines and such. They will be addressed as necessary.
If you have no intent whatsoever to register your character for pathfinder play, these are merely suggestions.
If you already have a registered Society character, please feel free to bring it along, we will see if it is eligible for the module I will run.

I have the whole day off so if you want to show up before 3pm for help/to hang, contact me before midnight tomorrow (tuesday) So I can put clothes on in time.

Choir is NOT Lame

I don't know if this will do anything for anyone's opinion, but I am huge fan of Bards and would admit approx half of my characters (a solid dozen total since '04)had a splash of Bard if not full progression.
I do agree that Bards, ESPECIALLY 3.0/3.5, are notorious for their terribleness. However, I am a huge proponent of the storyteller/chronicler archetype. As an adventurer or "princess saving bloke" they are not intended to fill main roles BUT, I would like to give a shout out to Paizo up on Pathfinder for re-working the class into something that doesn't totally suck.
If you care, I like THIS for new rule set & mechanics ANDDDD THIS GUY for an excellent build reference that gears a bard build towards 4th party member in a 4 person party.

As far as singing or playing the lute or even storytelling (as I've utilized it in my most recent builds) as a skill set for adventuring? That's not the mindset I've taken over the last decade. To me, and I would argue other "bard enthusiasts" agree, a bard is a party member who can combat, cast or know stuff just as well as anyone else in the group, BUT can also inspire his fellows and belittle his foes with great ease.
I would argue, it's sort of like a High School English teacher with a History Minor. It's not a necessary aspect of the beast, but it can definitely lend insight and inspiration that would not otherwise come into affect.

In a less metaphory example, I have built, and seen bards built, into things that can outcast equiv level wizards and out melee equiv level fighters. Honestly. Some of us like our PVP. No not as far as firepower per spell, nor as blow to blow, BUT, when executed correctly, winning wizards duels and mortal combats(every now and then our group gets really into arena type encounters).

Ran Dansin XIX, Thorin & Shingen. And GUESS WHO RUNS THE PARTY

Hope it wasn't too much of a ramble, but there's my bit.

GM Questionnaire

I think some of you may already be familiar with D&D With Porn Stars, either because you now read it, saw "I Hit it With My Axe," or I've mentioned it before. Mr. Sabbath has once more inadvertently assisted me in my endeavors to throw my mind thinkings into the void that is the interwebs with this cool RPG questionnaire. Let us jump right in . . . 

Pathfinder Part 2: the Beginner Box! @ S.G.I.S.Con 6

GM Questionnaire

Repost and answer. Or, if you don't have a blog, answer in the comments. Or be a big rebel and do neither.

1. If you had to pick a single invention in a game you were most proud of what would it be?
I can't think of any one thing I am super proud of. Mostly little things like magical items for my own characters or for the players, well laid out zones (cities/dungeons/castles). I guess it's the little things.

2. When was the last time you GMed?

Sunday night the 15th.

3. When was the last time you played?

Saturday night the 14th kinda. Sunday the 8th a full game.

4. Give us a one-sentence pitch for an adventure you haven't run but would like to.

The blood bags believe its over before 2013, you've begun to suspect your elders don't disagree, ready to travel south of the border to find the truth?

5. What do you do while you wait for players to do things?

Look up creature < double check creature < come up with encounter < double check encounter < Listen to the players complain/gripe/plot/give me ideas for what terrible things could be around that corner/in that hole/the npc could do to them.

6. What, if anything, do you eat while you play?

chips, candy, pizza, burgers, burrito's, pesto on non bread, anything & everything.

7. Do you find GMing physically exhausting? 

I didn't used to, but now that I put much more work into pre-planning, somehow, yes. But of course, as soon as everyone leaves, I am wired and cant go to bed till an hour or more later.

8. What was the last interesting (to you, anyway) thing you remember a PC you were running doing?

As another player's Eidelon(perma-summoned familiar/combat pet) I was a dub-step sparkle bear who spoke all the same languages the summoner did. When asked what my deal was we would say "waiting for the drop."

More seriously, my Shadow-spec Sorcerer developed a spell based off Peter Pan losing his shadow. "peter's Foley" separates the shadow from the target and they take Perma-Con damage until the shadow is re-attached, can only be done with a needle & thread or soap. Shadow attempts to get to the Shadow plan by any means.

9. Do your players take your serious setting and make it unserious? Vice versa? Neither?

Both, we are often very self aware of the ridiculousness of the worlds and it's usually a sign of accomplishment, as in a dedication to the story, when we are not cracking jokes or keeping it light.

10. What do you do with goblins?

play, slay, lay, punch, befriend, get healed by them. It all depends on the situation, game, diplomacy.

11. What was the last non-RPG thing you saw that you converted into game material (background, setting, trap, etc.)?

Dubstep as a cultural starting point? Peter Pan for sinister shadow spells? The 2012 apocalypse as an entire campaign arc? Everything is fair game. 

12. What's the funniest table moment you can remember right now?

My cousin Steve and his friend Mike were hanging out and Mike was watching some documentary on Discovery about Wolves. Steve was Dming a game later that night, Mike was one of the players that evening, he was a Dwarven Warrior with a hatred of Trolls. The party was high level and rolling through every combat Steve through at them, so He threw an army of trolls at them which surrounded the party. The lead troll stepped up and said, "I am Krukta, chief. What you do here?" Steve then asked, "what do you do?" Mike, "I fuck him." Steve, "what?!?" Mike, "well, the manual says trolls have similar tribal structure as wolf packs, and we were watching Discovery and THEY said, if you can fuck the leader and get away with it, you become the new leader . . . so, I fuck the leader." "Fine," says Steve, "roll to grapple." Mike crits his grapple check, then "controls the pin" and Steve is so amused at this point says, "5% chance you create a new race of 'drolls' " then rolls a 97. So the rest of trolls are very confused about this dwarf having his way with their chieftain and all they can muster is "do we help? maybe it Krukta new friend? He like?" But, its not all droll secret service and an army of trolls at your command. Krukta then followed the party as a cohort/nag board for Mike's dwarf for a few months straight.

13. What was the last game book you looked at--aside from things you referenced in a game--why were you looking at it?

Pathfinder Inner Sea World Guide & Pathfinder Tales Novels. I am a sucker for getting immersed in settings and lore. 

14. Who's your idea of the perfect RPG illustrator?

I want all styles as different flavors add different flair and tones to settings/sessions/worlds. It would be like saying I have a favorite type of music, it really is variable.

15. Does your game ever make your players genuinely afraid?

I don't think I've ever made my players spooked scared(in a horror sense) and I'm not sure I've ever made them fear for their characters lives, but I do know that they know, I will not hesitate to throw something on them that will drop their characters.

16. What was the best time you ever had running an adventure you didn't write? (If ever)

I have a good time running most modules. I have not done it much, but have enjoyed the handful I've actually thrown at my players. I've run them multiple times for different groups as well. 

17. What would be the ideal physical set up to run a game in?

That's a tough one because I'm theatre person and would LOVE to have a location for each game that fit the setting, with lighting and sound effects, anything and everything to immerse the players. That said, all I really need is a group, wherever, whenever, lets roll.

18. If you had to think of the two most disparate games or game products that you like what would they be?

I would say I'm kind of bland on this question but, White Wolf: World of Darkness and Paizo's Pathfinder

19. If you had to think of the most disparate influences overall on your game, what would they be?
Shameless internet Meme references, deep literary inspirations, and even cultural influences from arabia to zanzabar, the long way around.

20. As a GM, what kind of player do you want at your table?

One's that show up and will fight for the spotlight for an equal amount of time proportionate to how many participants there are. 4 players, one GM? A fifth of the time, whether it be deep RP, skill check silliness, or just rolling through creeps in a combat.

21. What's a real life experience you've translated into game terms?

All sorts of goofy little things. One of the biggest though is an additional rank of non-magical high quality items to simulate truly exceptional craftsmen. Beyond Masterwork are, in ascending order, Masrtercraft & Masterpeice. Somewhat to denote exceptional forges or even artists of crafts, such as the mythical western smiths or the revered blade artists of the east.

22. Is there an RPG product that you wish existed but doesn't?

Not really, there are so many products out that I still haven't dug my teeth into and want to, that adding more would only frustrate me.

23. Is there anyone you know who you talk about RPGs with who doesn't play? How do those conversations go?
Not on a regular basis as my S.O. plays and most of the people I talk to about it DO play. But even some of them who don't are geeks in other ways (gamers, anime kids, fantasy enthusiasts) so they usually understand everything I'm talking about. I'm not sure if this is entirely a blessing as I would like some fresh perspective sometimes, but then again, when I talk to my father-in-law about it, it becomes stilted and I have to use obtuse examples using mainstream games such as Monopoly and  blockbuster movies like LOTR, to explain what I'm going on about.

Black & Blue Box Bash

This last weekend I ran the Pathfinder Beginner Box Bash at Legends up at Vallco in Cupertino and it was a blast!
Although most of my RPG crews already have most of the books and play regular weekly games, I recommend this box to anyone.

First, perhaps the breakdown from "the Golem's mouth"


So yeah. All sorts of goodness in one box that costs less than the core book itself. And for those of you too lazy to watch the vid, here's a breakdown of the enclosed:

"Hero's Handbook:" Basically a shorthand style handbook for the players, with a cool "choose your own adventure" style setup at the beginning for those who cant wait to get rolling. Everything you need to roll a level one toon and buy gear with a some note son how combat & skill checks work.
For Experienced Pathfinders: Great quick reference for some more basic gear and mechanics. Lots of "shiny" inside. One customer said it reminded him of the old video game "Strategy guides" and that was enough alone to sell him on the box.

"Game Master's Guide:" A little thicker than the "Hero's" book, but understandably as it has all then bare bolts on how to run a game, make a game, a mini-bestiary in the back (all the monsters that have representation on the cut-outs below), and the main scenario to get players started on the road to Pathfinder table top gaming.
For Experienced Pathfinders: This little guy is a great quick-cheat book for forgetful GM's like myself, as well as it doubles as the scenario booklet and will probably stand up to more abuse than the usual one shot folio.

Double Sided Battle Map!: On one side, standard 1x1 square grid with generic yellow/tan mottled backdrop on which you can draw anything. I actually managed to fit all four scenarios for the bash on the one mat with the exception of a long pathway. I "dropped" one row from the map and it worked fine. The other side has the entire map for the "in box" scenario dungeon and I know I will definitely use it in the future as "generic dungeon X." You know how there are basically 5 different underground layouts in most MMO's? Yeah, like that. Also, as a total layout, I really like it's rooms, fixtures and dimensions. I know I could probably run it a few times without my group knowing it was the same map if they didn't have it sitting there in front of them. It is a stiff laminate board/paper/stock so it might not last as long as some "better" vinyl mats, BUT, I used a dry erase marker on it and it took fabulously and erased without a trace. I haven't used wet erase on it yet but it is designed to use "any marker."

Set of Dice: red, plastic, tumbled set of dice includes 1d4, 1d6, 1d8, 1d10, 1d"double-ot," 1d12 & 1d20. Hey, who doesn't like more/new dice? Need I say more?

Blank & Pre-Generated Character Sheets: The fighter Valeros, the rogue Merisiel, the wizard Erzen, and the cleric Kyra. Whom most of us might be familiar with from the majority of the art work or even the Society Pre-gens. Though they are not "built well" for many power gamers standards they are built CORRECTLY, as in according to Society rules and with some balance and flavor. They have cool breakdowns ON the character sheet to help explain everything to a new player so it can be decoded for noobies. Then, if they so desire, the blanks can be used to create their own characters in a simpler form than the standard PC Sheet, allowing a smooth transition into "classic" Char sheet layouts later.

Cardboard Cut-Out Miniature Token Sheets: As I have not yet fully committed to miniatures and play-mats, BUT HAVE decided to invest in some in the near future, these little guys are great for players like me who have not yet gone "whole hog" into the 3D representation but do enjoy having it as the 3 pages include male & female selections of every combination of dwarf, human, elf, fighter, rogue, wizard & cleric. THEN, it has a variety of creature's straight out of the "GMH" above, with enough of each to run the "in box" adventure. They're not just chinsy paper pieces that you have to fold the feet back & forth, these are sturdy, almost 16th of an inch thick, stock with more than enough plastic slot bases to stand them all up without having a cool breeze knock them over.

And of course, some standard propaganda for other Pathfinder products for those who wish to expand their game, as well as a "start-up" sheet that sits just below the dice, the pawn bases, & the battle mat, that breaks down exactly how to proceed no matter who opens the box and how many people are present.

So what? Who cares? Is it worth my time? My short answer, yes. Lets break it down a little further.
How much would I pay for that battle mat alone? 10-20 dollars. a set of dice, even cheap one's. peice meal, 5-15 dollars. cardboard miniature cut outs with plastic bases, "out of nowhere number if one were to buy the stock, print them out, cut them out, go to an arts & crafts store and buy the plastic bases scenario" $5 min?
Even if you are like me and already have a bunch of the books and are playing 3 games a week or more JUST in Pathfinder rule set, that's a $20 - $40 value on those items alone.
AND, if you're anything like me and are constantly pushing table top RPG's onto everyone you meet, having a more "board gamey" version to get people started with makes fantastic sense as opposed to scaring them with a dozen $30ish tomes and countless scribbled upon print-outs. Or, as described above, having short cheat books + a module for quick & easy gaming can get some SERIOUS use.
But WAIT, there's MORE. If you head to Paizo's page for the product they have FREE, yes FREE downloads to expand your experience once you've finished devouring everything in the box. Stuff for the "Heroes" in the form of leveling and gear (what every player wants) and a second adventure plus more in depth "tricks of the trade" for the GM's.
What's that worth in dollars would you say? Well, if we're paying by the page for sections of the Core, Bestiary & the GMG . . . . lets say, $15 of the Core, $3 of the Bestiary and $3 of the GMG, that totals to $21 of the "normal" publishing.
Les' tally that all up shall we? $41-$61 worth of goodness? So how much does it actually cost as that much awesome all packed into one box, usually like $100 bucks right? "Well I'm cheap so I want it for $50!" No worries dude, guess what . . .
I don't remember which pod cast this was from, but one of the gents I chatted with while running the Box last weekend said he had actually HEARD a Paizo designer say, "when they were developing The Box, the designer wanted ALL THIS and it NEEDED to be UNDER $35." So of course, it retails $34.99
WHAT!?!? That's crazy, I know! Even a low-bidding cynic like me can appreciate that kind of deal.

Yay, woo, neat stuff, but how about the CONTENT? Well, I'm glad you asked. Fun! Of course, WHO you play with is a factor, and I will be honest, one of the games I ran we had a young gentleman who I felt was . . . less than thrilled to be at the table, however, he admitted to having a good time after it was all said and done, so I hope he was not JUST being polite.
From day one I have found the pre-gens entertaining with their back stories. They are stereotypical in their classes but have enough little quirks that it HELPS a player slip into those characters and find the fun in them, while experiencing staples of the genre first hand. In this case, archetypes = good.
The adventure itself is a small hoot. There is equal opportunity for crafty dungeoners or hack & slashers. Some magic and some mundane plus a diverse yet mostly familiar crew of creepies inhabit this particular complex with simple yet creative encounters.
Overall I think even the most novice GM's could find ways to weave the overall scenario into most games, and of course, should this BE your first game, there are guidelines all over on how to make this the first of many or even seek out full blown Pathfinder Society play.

Woo, I think I'm fairly winded now. Not much else I can recall to expound upon further, so I hope this suffices. Oh, of course, most important of all, ENJOY!

Watch Out!

Quick! You got five dollars? You were gonna go get a double-double at InNOut weren't you? Dude, that'll take like, ten minutes, plus gas, you'd have to put on pants. Look, go shuffle into your food storage area, pull out some chips/munchies, throw some PB/hummus on some toast and come back. OH! and grab a soda.

I Think I'd look at you the same way if I saw you in your skivvies

You back? good.
So, I've covered a few Web-Series in the past, and even gotten some feedback about them from the creators themselves. So, as I continually try to do with Nerdcore, here I present a bit of an "update through my eyes" of a few properties for some of you, my readers, who are kind of lazy or just joining us.

Journey Quest, which has captured the heart and mind of one of my party members, seems to be fully funded for season 2. You can keep appraised of events up on there blog, and there are some REALLY cool resources that are cooked up specifically for Pathfinder, which I have a strong hunch we'll be using. According to the kickstarter they will start filming next year, OR, if they receive more donations, they will produce more.

A glistening group, GOLD, continues along. Though I have not seen any substantial postings on the site since August, the mood is that of steady activity. Donations are made through paypal, and I can't wait for season two to see how the league play is realised.

Standard Action continues with standards in action as they continue to promote and fund raise.Just past their half way goal, there is only 2 months left until the indie go go site is finished. And if you want bang for no-bucks, these guys deliver. There have been no shortage of free plugs

& samples from this crew in order to get people to donate. Just imagine what they will do if they HAVE the funds. You should have seen what they did in season one, and although it started a bit out of order for myself, the amount of passion and superb production value kept me hooked. If that isn't incentive enough, the donation gifts are very entertaining and if you're into the series I'm sure you'll find use for the prizes.

So, since I'm going to be spending all MY money on stage combat training (two workshops in 2 months) AND hoping my car/computer/family members don't die, so that I can replace up to two of the previous, PLEASE!! for me, use three of those dollars to donate to each of these series, and then donate the other two as you see fit. Or . . I guess go grab a $1 menu item at a cheaper fast food joint. mmmm, I want Jack Taco's now . . . Later guys, Keep supporting small entertainment, its not the size that counts, it's how you use it!

Got Your Ticket?

It's time to ride my train of thought again! Hold on, even I don't know if it's a one way or a circuitous clover leaf of madness. Caution, Do Not Read! Contains heavy content as well as flippant. feel free to skip to parts that take your interest. You have been warned.


"Feelings . . . thing about . . . uninspired inspiration."
I was having trouble trying to develop a coherent post for you guys. And, after consuming some new and old art (i.e. music, shows) I was reminded of a mind set I have often spoken in theatre. "To hell with the audience, this is for us." Now don't get me wrong, as of right now and from the start, I love you guys. As far as I can tell the bulk of you guys are friends or people who found me interesting and stuck around, I very much appreciate that and hold that interest close to my heart, thank you. But before I get all mushy, I'm going to get to my point. Wait, no I'm not. I say "from the start until now" because I wait with bated breath for my first trolls and critiques, and though I may not like them, I am . . . preparing myself, for brutal opinions and criticism.
Now for the point. As with many things in life, dominantly art, but also in science, labor and spirituality. It's best, most powerful. when you do it for yourself. When the goal is fulfillment, enrichment, or plain honest work.
Hence the crazy dense random post. I'm writing because I want this blog to be excellent because it's an outlet for me and I wish to share the amalgamation that is my brain, because I like to tell stories, share my brain AND it would seem many people have expressed a desire to receive that. So, to the lovers and the haters, thanks for reading, thanks for thinking. Oh, and PLEASE don't stop thinking.

Other thing I wanted to gab about.

Pathfinder/D&D character build.
(Warning: I'm just going to blab about a build or two I'm cooking up and most likely not going to explain too much or link to anything, I'm just going to assume you know exactly what the hell I'm blathering about OR, you can look it up yourself.)
I'm cooking up a build for a roguish, rakish, dual wielding, dashing, snarky bastard only out for himself. He's a Dansin, which means he needs to be able to detect magic, because all Dansin's interact with the arcane through olfactory senses. In 3.5 I could always burn my human feat on Insightful to give me detect magic, read magic &/or mage hand. However, as of this posting I can't find any feats that give me this sort of thing. I did think that perhaps I could take Minor Magic rogue talent, but, you don't get rogue talents till level 2. So, seeing as there are no restrictions on multiclassing, I thought maybe taking my first level in Bard. Why bard and not sorcerer or something, because I also had the idea that since he's a brash jerk he might take Dazzling Display to intimidate his opponents.
More specifically, I have this vision of him standing over dandies who challenged him to single combat whom he then destroyed, wooing women along the way. Glorious, right (slight sarcasm, but tell me if the concept doesn't have some . . . romance)?
But! Then I also kind of wanted to take Weapon Specialist variant because I intend for him to dual wield a Brace (or 'Case')" of rapiers. I would have to take 4 levels of  Wep. Spec. to get to the first perk, then 2 more levels of Two weapon fighter, THEN, 2-5 levels of Rogue with Rake variant, ON TOP of a level in Bard to get my Dansin traits. Pathfinder Society play only goes up to level 12. Ive almost maxed out levels just trying to get to the full build of my awesome character concept. Is it to broken?
AND, there are no rules anywhere, so far, for a Brace of Rapiers AANNDD I kind of want it to be a trick set where you can actually carry it on one side and without a good perception check most people will think it's a single rapier. So, I'll have to convince my DM's to use special rules I've been cooking up using the Dual Katana Staff, Rapier, cane sword, and weapon damage charts to come up with a good presentation.
Baring that, I may have to keep two sets of gold tallies if a DM says No, and I have to go traditional Two rapiers, or Rapier & short sword, or some such.
And as a note, I WORE two rapiers just last Sunday, it's not that uncomfortable, so I could totally do that, I don't actually think it looked that goofy.

I had another build or two planned, maybe even confess I FINALLY watched Firefly all the way through, but then again maybe not. should be able to cook up some sort of 3rd for th3 nerd before the end of the month. now it's just rambling, less rant/idea sharing. I'll call it now, as it's been 12 hours since I started this post and I think I'm good. Hopefully things will continue to not get worse. Wish me a swift recovery as I AM sick as of the writing of this post. Night, H47ites!

A Tale of Two Burritozilla's

How does your gaming crew end a campaign? Ours does it with booze, Epic Meal Time homage's, Huge Fuckin' Blades & Huge Fuckin' Burritos.

Birth is a beautiful, yet terrifying thing.

"Oh nos! We just fought a dragon shaman who may or may not have been epic level and NOW there's a size category HUGE green dragon barreling down on us as we sit like hors d'oeuvres on a plate on top of a temple." No, bitch! My group says BRING IT!!1! We're eating 17' death rolls of Mexican goodness then pouring poison into our gullet holes while we FUCK THAT DRAGON! No shit, the dwarf just made a grapple check, now he's rolling to control the pin.

"Let's go to Work."

Before we get (yes, I'm going to say it) ROLLIN' we have to divy up this mass of meat, beans, rice, awesome, sauce & tortilla so that all may partake of the madness. "But h4773r? Are you gonna use one of those little Bitch Kitchen knives? That would take forever." FUCK NO! I use Aniki, the beast from the far east, the edge from the edge of the world, my Kanetsune.

Luh-Ike! BUHTTUH! I came a little. I wont lie about that. And yes, that is a wooden battle board with scorch marks for the grid. Ti Slut did that up nice just for our group.

"But where will you cut it? That's not your table and you don't want to get 'zilla juices all over the floor? Are you going to go outside?" FUCK NO! This is D&D right? We use the fucking metal-ass battle board to slice these vessels of sustenance, then we use it for tactical visualization, like a Boss.

Aniki, Drippin', not ready to take his tip out of the battle board. Burritozilla, divided. Was it good for you?

And so, as the sounds of gnashing nerds and guzzling geeks echo against the walls of our dining area, shit is being bulled. My compatriots enjoy their last moments as living characters before I destroy them with emerald, winged, acid breathing death. On film, for your consideration.

Perhaps the camera man (RunningRyan) and myself will make a transcript and post it so you can hear my witty ass remarks. Probably not though, as you should just watch it 3 times like I did.
And guess what? We did it again last week, only it got crazyer, with more video, and hopefully better quality. Tune in!

A Gateway to Societal Paths

Just got back from Strategicon:Gateway, almost "today (as in we almost got home past midnight last night)" but in retrospect, I am so glad I decided to tag along with J.C..
First day we had not even asked ourselves what we wanted to play when a enthusiastic gentleman began to chat us up. apparently he was running a pathfinder game where the PC's play a band of goblins, a fantastic one shot. I agree to go play. (Apparently it was a one shot for Pathfinder Society, which I had toyed with signing up for in the past, but had not committed to, as I had not fully researched it.) We assemble and start picking pre-gen goblins, but there is a small army of us, grossly exceeding the encounter CR so we move to a different room and split into two groups as one of the players volunteers to DM. I opted to join the Last Second Group, where I meet "D.J?.", an older gentleman than myself with a goatee and a wicked glint in his eye who volunteered to DM and "H.Hazzard." a bespectabled, well built, prematurely-balding-batman-baseball cap wearing, crazy eyed glaring chap as well.
The goblin crew set out, I opted for the NE cleric of the Goblin God (we were all evil, and, like you do, hate dogs & horses and LOVE fire) and at the beginning of our first combat, before we were allowed to perform any actions, we had to sign our "goblin song (all the pregen's had a quaint little flavor text box)" in order to continue the session. An hour goes by as we get to the dungeon(read:combat grid map section) and barrel through it as H.Hazzard's goblin has a barbarian like rage whenever he smells dogs. Quote "Ah hayt dawgs. Aye smell'um." and as evidence from some of the other parties in character voices, these goblins have cajun accents as our speculated cooking also runs along that vein.
We barrel down into the boss fight as H.Hazzard busts through a floor to get to the dogs, wielding a "goblin sized great club" (a horse joint we hacked off our first major encounter "stompy") and the hilarity ensues. Our alchemist cant stay standing, our rogue, shy from one of the first fights, doesn't make come into the room till round 4, the fighter wont even consider the boss(an evil druid with a Med. Frog companion) until all dogs are rendered unidentifiable, and the bard is doing his/her best to be useful. Seeing as the rogue is wielding a gift from the chief (a +1 weapon) he has a n extra "dogslicer(knife)" and refusing to dual wield with his standard one, I, the cleric, Sleight of Hand it off of him while he's prone, 2 combats previously and am now a dual-wielding cleric.
I get a swarm dropped on me, there are three dogs up as well as the boss & her toad, so, I do what I think any self respecting NE goblin cleric who already blew his burning hands earlier that day would do! Channel negative energy, three consecutive rounds. Even until the last day of the con (four days total) the Goblin MVP's were myself for nearly dropping half of my own party as the CLERIC, and the alchemist from the OTHER group for playing sloppy with the AoE from his bombs. And so, just as I get swallowed by the toad, my group manages to finish off the toad & the druid, all wrapped up in less than 2&1/2 hours. A fantastic introduction to Pathfinder Society if I do say so myself. D.J?. granted us every bonus and accolade he could for that session on the Chronicle sheet.

Second day, I waited around for something, decided to opt out, then was dragged along to a live event called The Dungeon Master and since I had not yet done any RP that day, decided to sign up to play/perform.
This was a blast. Despite the fact some of our party members had not even hit puberty yet, they were enthusiastic and ready to solve every problem with whatever weapon they had at hand. I felt I presented a slightly better than mediocre display of my wit and wisdom as well as a one shot on the "boss" of the session. Apparently my snark, ability to combine rhymes for pun-tastic couplets, and willingness to contribute to the terrible pop-culture references and inside jokes made me the audience favorite for that session, gaining me free admission to their shows for their next season.

Day Three, I am on a mission to play another game with D.J?. as the DM if he runs one and I have also resolved to join the Pathfinder Society in full and roll up a character. I have done a bit of research and am learning about the world of Golarion so I begin trolling the corner/hole the society had been regulated to. I find D.J?. and he is sitting, eyes closed and chiming in to a game he seemed to be helping with. I tried to chat him up a bit and after hearing simply that he would be running other games, wandered off to begin rolling up a Pathfinder legit toon. I find some amiable gents who've been playing Society for some time, as well as H.Hazzard, and the BSing ensues while I choose what type of ridiculousness Golarion is about to defile its universe.
I opted to join in to a tier 1 game and so my reign of silly has begun. After gaining the approval of 1 and 2 1/2 ninja's (i would say only half approval from two of the three) oh, I'm sorry, "merchants," and noobing it up/messing with our cleric (who was being RPed excellently) I had completed my first real Society mission.
I tracked down D.J?. again, this time he was MUCH chipper (apparently a 6 hour nap has that effect) and agreed to let me jump into a game with a pregen he was running later that eve.
And so, at 8pm we assembled, H.Hazzad was running his crazy high AC warrior (33 AC before buffs), I snagged the Rogue from the core book as my other choice was the warrior, and we already had one. The gal RUNNING a few things at the con decided to jump in as our healer, the Cleric from the core as well. AND to round out our crew we had a fantastic battle-buff-bard/savage skald of serious Nordic flavor. APPARENTLY, this tier was 8-9, the "real" characters were level 8 and the cleric & I were level 7, so we we're technically UNDERpowered for the session. so, about 2/3rd through the first encounter we almost KILLED, like, dead dead, more than -10 plus -your con score, but thankfully, D.M?. re-did some math and realized he was using the higher level stats for the encounter so re-dialed the damage. We were then offered the opportunity to restart the session for a more appropriate adventure, but we opted to be badass, and managed to plow through and complete the task, we might have had SOME help from the DM, but even with some junk rolls and maybe some meta-gaming from the DM and the cleric, we had some great moments. Even so, I think we earned those points.

Terrikahnia: Part 1

That is the name of the world I am currently running two concurrent Pathfinder games in. The main continent/human kingdom is called Greethelude, and has a late medieval/EARLY Renaissance (read: less than 12 NPC's over level 15 core classes). The adventures sort of top out at level 10 or so, but could be easily scaled up or down. For higher powered games I would lead the groups to different areas that I have not fully developed.

Its origins are actually from a failed forum RPG some acquaintances I met in high school attempted to start, called "Hellsent." Then later, as I fleshed out the world and recycled the original setting & plot I now borrow HEAVILY from one of my current WoW Guilds, "Lords of Ancient Sin" on Cenarius. Characters and characteristics of players have been translated to the universe for NPC's, and even some of the back story.

In Pathfinder the Cavalier is usually linked to an order, and one of my players chose the "Dragon" order in the book. For flavor, I reworked it for my universe and dubbed it "The Order of Schorl's Heart."

"Upon entering the Order you are granted the "Heart of Schorl" medallion.

Schorl was a female half elf Paladin who was the love of King Shakoo. Though they we're torn apart by scandal, Schorl continued to serve the kingdom and maintained her status as a beacon of light, protection and forgiveness to all.

The only order to openly recruit all genders, Men in the order are called "Consorts of Schorl" while Women are called "Schorl's Gaurd"

Derogatory terms for the men are "Schorl's Eunichs" and for the females they are either "Schorl's Busoms" or . . . "Consorts of Schorl"

King Grimmean Rules from the Northern city named Loas Keep. Generally he is a just and even headed king, though not a weakling, he did study magic more than the blade in his younger days and is still known to dabble when the restraints of court allow. Soledad "the Bear" or "Grimms Right Hand" is a well known Paladin, of the "Order of the Hammer & Shield," is a fierce protector of the kingdom and is a sight to behold. There are some unsavory rumors that "The Bear" and his Highness are more than just good friends but any mention of it in court has been met with swift disdain and lack of any solid evidence quells the conversation quickly, the offending party often falls out of everyone's favor.

A weeks ride to the south of Loas Keep brings you to Shakoo Ridge, the old capitol, and the first city of the Kingdom. Established as the "frontier fortress" as King Shakoo pushed his dominion into the north, It has become a dingy trading city where every sort of riffraff an be found. Ruled by a Duke openly, there seems to be an unofficial ruling body in the city known as "The Knaves." The thieves guild, the mysterious leader is referred to only as "Sirrah," recently they have had serious issues controlling the underbelly of the city figuratively and literally as another force has pushed them to the safety of their hold outs, the main of which is often heard referred to as "Home." To some of the more skilled and high profile "knaves" in the city, a person who goes by "M", who has sometimes signed certain correspondence as "MNBF" is said to be a shadow manifested to serve the will of Sirrah. He is often a contact and offers various jobs, contracts and orders. Never has he said it is the order of Sirrah, nor has he admitted to being a Knave to others, most can assume there is a close connection.

Another point of interest is the Temple of Tyr. Run by dark skinned clerics, it is known for it's laid back nature and it's strange acceptance of bards at all hours in its main hall of worship. The head Centurion is named Tyrone, and the High Priest is Klashaft Ngaulikahn, who goes by "shaft" for short.

One of the seedier taverns in town is called the Sickly Dragon, it has a fairly descriptive sign out front, and is known for its ability to be back to . . not clean, but normal, after almost any altercation form the night/morning before.

The Nightman, or the Captain of the city constabulary is a middle aged man who has not gone soft in the middle named Emilius Nolan Bartholomew Finch, and ensures that even though the Knaves run rampant through the city that citizens stay as safe as possible in such a city. And even though you may get your purse cut, your neck shouldn't, unless of course, you ran afoul of someone, in which case, accidents do happen. The recent shift in power has not let him sleep easy during the day, he's said to sleep almost from when he goes home to when his shift starts the next eve.

I'm not entirely sure If or when I post a part 2, but, if any of my players wish to take a test on any of this content I will possibly grant them some sort of boon, like XP, a feat. skill points in knowledge(not sure), or cool items.

Finding a Path Through Third and a Half

Aright table top nerds, here's how I break it down.

I have played version 3.5 D&D for about six years now, fairly familiar with the system, I can make all sorts of builds and my group(s) and I can come up with mechanics for most issues we encounter.

Recently, some players in my group started using/buying Pathfinder. The words "Three point seven-five" were muttered constantly and once two members of the group purchased books and the D.M. downloaded the pdf's we actually played a couple campaigns. I have since broken down and purchased the Core and the APG and done massive builds due to a high power one shot we had two months to prep for.

Verdict:
If you can, or want to, buy Pathfinder. I wont lie, its shiny, new and sexy, BUT, it does address a lot of mechanic/customizable options and makes the super-customizable 3.5 into a massive awesomeness.
If money is tight or you have ALL the books for 3.5 already, no pressure to switch.
However, if one person buys the Pathfinder books, you are SCREWED if a second person buys the books.

3.5 is the original, and has "the real system" but Pathfinder was originally intended to be a massive supplement to 3.5, or at least that was the impression I got from reading some of opening notes, and it turned into this massive project.


Fun fact, Pathfinder taught me that Vash The Stampede

& Alucard
exist in D&D, eh?

S.G.I.S.Con IV Recap

Only 1 month late! Okay, so I lied about blogging the entire Con. I was having too much fun actually being at the Con . . . and Raiding. Heh.

A couple resources Care of T1nk The Con Fairy!

If you didn't already know, this year was Star Wars themed. We HAD the Christmas special, but due to technical difficulties we were unable to watch it. However, we did have a showing of "Something Something Something Dark Side" and "Spaceballs" for those who had not been exposed to it's awesomeness.

Overall this year was a success even though there were a few bumps for the management.

We had 2 tv's set up next to each other with a PA system and 5 different systems hooked to them, ACROSS from another TV, with D&D & Laptopery 2 yards to the right and board gaming 1 yard to the left.

Upstairs Sexy Chris and myself had set up our desktops (we had raids Saturday & Sunday night. WoW is SRZ BSNZ. true story, while we did cake and they sang happy birthday, I was IN an Ony 10 and they were waiting for me to do cake cause I had mentioned WHY i was gonna have to AFK for a few minutes.) And there were numerous netbooks as well. Oh, and fun fact . . . Idevices (iPhones, iTouches) will suck up your bandwidth like a 50 cent hooker sucks up . . . water. They have to stay hydrated.

Let me correct myself right now, there was no D&D from late Friday night until late Sunday night there was Pathfinder, led by Steve Wes, and half of the Con rolled characters and proceeded to have ridiculous adventures. I will see if I can get a guest post from Mr. Wes detailing the adventure, but if you cant wait, look HERE.

Closing ceremonies went swiftly and the Sad Geek in Snow this year was Mr. Robe Guy, he also donned a snuggy a few times and accepted his new "friend" graciously.
I hope you all had as much or more fun than I did and I will leave you with one last peace of shameless self admiration. This was caught by T1nk/theatreg33k while I was stretching my pipes. You can also hear the shenanigans of the Pathfinder group in the background, just as amusing. Thanks, love.